Henry Rifle Forums

I think our Lounge Area is a good place for brief mentions of various paraprosdokians.
A friend of mine sent me a small list of these expressions, but I'd never heard of them, and didn't know what they are. So I looked up the definition:

DEF: "A paraprosdokian is a figure of speech in which the latter part of a sentence, phrase, or larger discourse is surprising or unexpected in a way that causes the reader or listener to reframe or reinterpret the first part. It is frequently used for humor, and is extremely popular among comedians and satirists."

Well, I'm no comedian, but thought these were cool and fun to read. So I hope to remember to post some of them from time-to-time.

~~~These reflect my on-going approach to elder age.
You're never too old to learn something stupid.

I'm supposed to respect my elders, but it's getting harder and harder for me to find one now.

~~~Of course, a visual aid is always helpful as seen in this paraprosdokian.
~~~The last one for this post supports our interest in Henry rifles and the shooting sports.

To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.


Hope these spread a few chuckles on our front & rear porches.
Have a "happy" day, Everyone.

I like that last one! Then I would finally be able to shoot as well as some of the other folks on this forum.

Unfortunately, I am a living representation of the first one because even at my age (or maybe because of my age) I usually manage to do something stupid every day.

I'm not as dumb as I look.

Will Rogers in 1931: "Do you know how many thousands of law students just graduated? It's going take an awful lot of crime to support them. "

Not sure if that qualifies, but he was a funny guy.

RR, I'm not sure if that is a "pure paraprosdokians" either. But it's plain 'ole funny! That's what this thread is to be about. = FUN

Agreed -- Will Rogers was a funny guy.

This Paraprosdokian is for those of you good Folk, who "farm" in your backyards. It clearly shows that understanding your harvest is a good thing.

"Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad."

These are slowly becoming popular, so I started poking around for other examples.

"On the other hand, we have different fingers." -- Jack Handey

Five out of four people don't understand fractions.

There are ten kinds of people. Those who understand binary, and those who don't.

The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

When I first posted this thread, I wasn't quite sure if there would be any interest. But the several comments and/or paraprosdokians posted so far have been fun to read.....I think. Anyway, I hope we'll keep posting these for a little longer, don't you? If we don't, then maybe I was wrong from the very start. Sigh....oh well.

Here is another paraprosdokian I found this evening.
Until another day.

"I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not so sure."

In keeping with 2016 as a General Election year, here is a "political" paraprosdokian.
Trust someone has a good answer to this question!

"Why do Americans choose from just two people to run for president and 50 for Miss America ?"

PT7 wrote:
Trust someone has a good answer to this question!

"Why do Americans choose from just two people to run for president and 50 for Miss America ?"

Because the fifty Miss America contestants always all look great; the two presidential contestants, not so much.

Here is my entry,
"If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong".

"When you come to a fork in the road, take it."

I'm not as dumb as I look.

A good paraprosdokian follow-up to the one from SH about "looks:"

"Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak."

I'll keep quiet now. All have a great weekend!!

How about,
"I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn’t it".

"Dolphins are so smart that within a few weeks of captivity, they can train people to stand on the very edge of the pool and throw them fish."