My thoughts for today:

[markiver54]

Think I'll get a puppy...never know who's gonna go first. Who..me? Did I say that ? What a terrible thought.
Ya never know though. What I do know though, is in that scenario, my next partner would be Canine.

[cooperhawk]

Male Logic

THIS IS A CONVERSATION BETWEEN A MAN AND HIS WIFE.
PLEASE NOTE THAT SHE ASKS SEVEN QUESTIONS, WHICH HE ANSWERS QUITE SIMPLY.

BUT THEN SHE IS SPEECHLESS AFTER ANSWERING ONLY ONE QUESTION FROM HIM
I BET THIS HAPPENS MORE OFTEN THAN NOT TO MOST HUSBANDS OUT THERE:

WOMAN: DO YOU DRINK BEER?

MAN: YES

WOMAN : HOW MANY BEERS A DAY?

MAN: USUALLY ABOUT THREE

WOMAN: HOW MUCH DO YOU PAY PER BEER?

MAN: $5.00 WHICH INCLUDES A TIP (THIS IS WHERE IT GETS SCARY!)

WOMAN: AND HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN DRINKING?

MAN: ABOUT 20 YEARS, I SUPPOSE

WOMAN: SO A BEER COSTS $5 AND YOU HAVE THREE BEERS A DAY WHICH PUTS YOUR SPENDING EACH MONTH AT $450.

IN ONE YEAR, IT WOULD BE APPROXIMATELY $5400 CORRECT?

MAN: CORRECT

WOMAN: IF IN 1 YEAR YOU SPEND $5400, NOT ACCOUNTING FOR INFLATION,

THE PAST 20 YEARS PUTS YOUR SPENDING AT $108,000 CORRECT?

MAN: CORRECT

WOMAN: DO YOU KNOW THAT IF YOU DIDN’T DRINK SO MUCH BEER, THAT MONEY COULD HAVE BEEN PUT IN A STEP-UP INTEREST SAVINGS ACCOUNT AND AFTER ACCOUNTING FOR COMPOUND INTEREST FOR THE PAST 20 YEARS, YOU COULD HAVE NOW BOUGHT AN AIRPLANE?

MAN: DO YOU DRINK BEER?

WOMAN: NO.

MAN: WHERE IS YOUR AIRPLANE?

[Ernie]

Good Point.