You Can't Trust A Woman....
Posted: Sun Dec 10, 2017 10:40 pm
I have to tell you... ... You just can't trust a woman when there is a bet on the line. Miss Tina and I were fishing our favorite farm pond, and had made a small bet. Nothing big mind you, but it was the principle of the thing. Now... ... Miss Tina doesn't like to lose. This farm pond, holds some monster bass, but they just didn't seem to be biting.
I love this pond. We drive thru three farm gates, across four pastures, dodge huge Black Angus cows, and ford a (hopefully) dry creek bed to reach it... but it's worth it. Sometimes, it's interesting. One time we came off the pond, and we had fished the ocean a couple days before. The COWS had licked all the SALT off the windows. They traded us... left behind dried green grassy cow spit. YOU can't see OUT of dried green grassy cow spit and the windshield washer fluid doesn't clean it. Luckily, I was a Marine... and had Windex, nearly a full bottle and a roll of paper towels in the Subaru. I had an empty bottle and NO paper towels when we were done.
On another occasion I look up and a huge cow is scratching her BUTT on the brush guard on the front of my brand new Nissan Frontier Pro4x... The rear end of the truck is moving up and down and the wheels are nearly rising off the ground.
I YELL at her, no joy.
I slap the water hard with the paddle. She is in ecstasy... no joy, she just continues to rub her big hairy butt on the brush guard and my truck is rocking.
I dig thru the waterproof box in the hatch in front of me and find my keys. I am grinning thinking how funny this is going to be. I point the key fob at the truck and push the alarm button. The lights flash, the horn blows and the alarm siren goes off....
SHE leaps forward and starts snorting and mooing, and kicks back and sprays the front of my truck with foul liquid grass from the rear cow exit. (Ah... green slimy poo.) Brush Guard, Grill, radiator.... Hood, even up on the windshield. Wait... NOT funny. (I had to go thru the CAR WASH on the way home and pressure wash the poo away... ) I never tried THAT Car Alarm Trick again.
Ah, where was I? Bet... Tina, And Fishing.
Oh yeah, she doesn't like to lose.
So, we are working our way around the pond, and I am ahead of her and about to turn the corner to work the back edge of the horseshoe shaped pond with the fly rod. Miss Tina is working the inside edge of the shoe. I glance back and like the look of the color of the kayak against the background and snap a pic just as I hear her make a funny clicking sound. A huge bass jumps into her kayak.
Wait... what? She reaches down and picks up the fish... lifts it to feel the weight... Hmmm... "Hey Baby," she calls, "Look what I caught!"
"Wow," I yell, "Nice Fish, your lucky day. I guess you win."
She holds it up and looks it over..... "Meh, I can do better," and slips it over the side.
She proceeds to catch two more bigger than that one.
I love that pond.
Sometimes Grumpy and the fly rod scores as well.
I love this pond. We drive thru three farm gates, across four pastures, dodge huge Black Angus cows, and ford a (hopefully) dry creek bed to reach it... but it's worth it. Sometimes, it's interesting. One time we came off the pond, and we had fished the ocean a couple days before. The COWS had licked all the SALT off the windows. They traded us... left behind dried green grassy cow spit. YOU can't see OUT of dried green grassy cow spit and the windshield washer fluid doesn't clean it. Luckily, I was a Marine... and had Windex, nearly a full bottle and a roll of paper towels in the Subaru. I had an empty bottle and NO paper towels when we were done.
On another occasion I look up and a huge cow is scratching her BUTT on the brush guard on the front of my brand new Nissan Frontier Pro4x... The rear end of the truck is moving up and down and the wheels are nearly rising off the ground.
I YELL at her, no joy.
I slap the water hard with the paddle. She is in ecstasy... no joy, she just continues to rub her big hairy butt on the brush guard and my truck is rocking.
I dig thru the waterproof box in the hatch in front of me and find my keys. I am grinning thinking how funny this is going to be. I point the key fob at the truck and push the alarm button. The lights flash, the horn blows and the alarm siren goes off....
SHE leaps forward and starts snorting and mooing, and kicks back and sprays the front of my truck with foul liquid grass from the rear cow exit. (Ah... green slimy poo.) Brush Guard, Grill, radiator.... Hood, even up on the windshield. Wait... NOT funny. (I had to go thru the CAR WASH on the way home and pressure wash the poo away... ) I never tried THAT Car Alarm Trick again.
Ah, where was I? Bet... Tina, And Fishing.
Oh yeah, she doesn't like to lose.
So, we are working our way around the pond, and I am ahead of her and about to turn the corner to work the back edge of the horseshoe shaped pond with the fly rod. Miss Tina is working the inside edge of the shoe. I glance back and like the look of the color of the kayak against the background and snap a pic just as I hear her make a funny clicking sound. A huge bass jumps into her kayak.
Wait... what? She reaches down and picks up the fish... lifts it to feel the weight... Hmmm... "Hey Baby," she calls, "Look what I caught!"
"Wow," I yell, "Nice Fish, your lucky day. I guess you win."
She holds it up and looks it over..... "Meh, I can do better," and slips it over the side.
She proceeds to catch two more bigger than that one.
I love that pond.
Sometimes Grumpy and the fly rod scores as well.